David Beckham is celebrating; "43 days, 43 days!" he shouts happilly. Posh asks him why hes celebrating.
He answers "Well Honey, I've done this jigsaw in only 43 days."

"And that's good?" asks Posh.
"You bet Hon" says David."It says 3 to 6 years on the box."
Q: What do David Beckham and British rail trains have in common.
A: They both go in and out of Victoria



Q: What do the England footbal team and Posh Spice both have in common?
A: They've both been screwed by David Beckham.



Q: Why did Posh Spice marry David Beckham?
A: Because he's the only fella who can lob Seaman at 60 yards!

David Beckham has gone crazy believing Posh has been having an affair on him. In manic rage, he goes out and buys a gun. He rushes home to confront his wife, and finds her in bed with none other than Ruud Van Nistelroy.
Devastated, Beckham takes out the gun and points it at his own head.
"No, David don't do it." Posh cries jumping up from her spot underneath the covers...."I'm sorry and I know we can work this out."
"Shut up and sit back Victoria." Beckham replies. "You're next."


Q: What would David Beckham's name be if he was a Spice Girl?
A: Waste of Spice

David Beckham walks into a sperm donor bank,
"I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist.
"Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?".
"Yes" replies Beckham "you should have my details on your computer".
"Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Shall I call Posh Spice for you?"
"Why do I need help?" asks Beckham. The receptionist replies
"Well David, it says on your record that you're a useless wnka...."

David Beckham walks into a pub.
The landlord says 'A pint of your usual, David?'
Beckham replies 'No, just a half, then I'm off'
Q: What do Barry Manilow and David Beckham have in common?
A: A: They are both f***ing useless singers.


Q: What's the difference between David Beckham and Posh?
A: Posh Spice doesn't kick back when she's taken from behind.

No-one cares

dont post then dikhead

Swerve u prat
there gd jokes
nice one
ive got one i think ... bit longwinded...

Einstein, Picasso and Becham r standin at the pearly gates in front of st. peter himself. When Einstein approaches peter, he syas, "how can u prove that u r Eintein. I need proof because people will do anything to get into heacven thses days." So Einstein explains the theory of realtivity in depth and he goes thru the pearly gates.
The its the turn of Picasso. When st. peter asks picasso how he can prove he is Picasso. Picasso says, "to prove i am Picasso, i will draw u using less then 10 stokes. He wuickly produces a masterpiece and is let thru into heaven.
Then its Bechams turn to enter heaven. St. Peter asks Becham to prove that is the famous footabller just like Picasso and Einstein did. To which Becham replies, " Who are Einstein And Piscasso."
"Welcome to heaven David," replies Peter.

similar to livvys but...............
yes yes yes beckham shouted what sed posh ... beckham sed i've done this jigsaw in na wek and it says on the box 3 to 4 years

Q: Why did Posh Spice marry David Beckham?
A: Because he's the only fella who can lob Seaman at 60 yards!

i get the semen bit but wtf david beckham lobbing him ??

It's to tie in with the joke . lol tom :s

livvys lost it m8 lol the joke is crap =-D