Your mum jokes
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2 Deleted User
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12:57 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
What are your favourites?
Your mum is so fat, she stepped on the scales and it said, to be continued.
Your mum is so fat, she makes free willy look like a tic tac.
Your mums so fat that when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw food at her.
*Not aimed at anyone's mum! Just generally funny "your mum" jokes
Your mum is so fat, she stepped on the scales and it said, to be continued.
Your mum is so fat, she makes free willy look like a tic tac.
Your mums so fat that when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw food at her.
*Not aimed at anyone's mum! Just generally funny "your mum" jokes
Deleted User
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14:04 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
lol, Yo Mama So Ugly...
she put the Boogie man outta business.
she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt
when she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..."
when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'
she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!
minutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said, "Yes, now let's go and bury her..."
they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies.
when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote!
yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye...
she put Marilyn Manson out of business.
she was a guard at Snake Mountain
they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock...
she put the Boogie man outta business.
she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt
when she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..."
when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'
she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!
minutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said, "Yes, now let's go and bury her..."
they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies.
when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote!
yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye...
she put Marilyn Manson out of business.
she was a guard at Snake Mountain
they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock...
Deleted User
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14:05 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
even Harry Knowles refused to date her.
they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty!
she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween.
Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.
you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time.
she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.
we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.
I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo.
her shadow gave up.
people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her...
her mom had to be P*ssed drunk just to breast feed her.
they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty!
she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween.
Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.
you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time.
she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.
we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.
I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo.
her shadow gave up.
people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her...
her mom had to be P*ssed drunk just to breast feed her.
Deleted User
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14:05 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
when born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows.
hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.
instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.
they gave her a middle name...'accident'.
she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down.
when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application!
even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her...
when she was born the Doc smacked her face.
You mama so Ugly that she's got her very own Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags named after her...
stay tuned for yo mama so stupid jokes......
Edited at 19:06 Fri 6/05/05 (BST)
hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.
instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.
they gave her a middle name...'accident'.
she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down.
when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application!
even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her...
when she was born the Doc smacked her face.
You mama so Ugly that she's got her very own Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags named after her...
stay tuned for yo mama so stupid jokes......
Edited at 19:06 Fri 6/05/05 (BST)
Deleted User
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14:07 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
Yo Mama So Stupid...
she stole Free Loafs from the Bakers.
I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder...
she make Homer Simpson look like a Nobel Prize winner
she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Cif.
she noticed a sign reading 'Wet Floor'...so she just did!
it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
when you were born, she looked at your umbilical cord and said, "Wow, it comes with cable too!"
she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken.
she got locked in the Quickie Mart and nearly starved to death.
she sold her Car for Petrol cash!
she reckoned a Quarterback was a refund...
she stole Free Loafs from the Bakers.
I told her drinks were on the house...so she went and got a ladder...
she make Homer Simpson look like a Nobel Prize winner
she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Cif.
she noticed a sign reading 'Wet Floor'...so she just did!
it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
when you were born, she looked at your umbilical cord and said, "Wow, it comes with cable too!"
she asked for a refund on a jigsaw puzzle complaining it was broken.
she got locked in the Quickie Mart and nearly starved to death.
she sold her Car for Petrol cash!
she reckoned a Quarterback was a refund...
Deleted User
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14:07 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
she once attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a Kerb.
she cooks Indian curry with Old Spice.
she leaves tell tales signs she's been using my computer - white out (tipp ex) is on the screen.
she took a job cutting grass on an Oil Rig.
I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
it took her 2 days to make Microwaveable Pot Noodles.
she invented a silent car alarm.
that when you stand beside her you can actually hear the ocean
she really thought the cinema was selling Free Willies...
she watches The Three Stooges and takes notes.
she was born on Halloween and can't remember her birthday.
she thought Morning Dew was a New York radio station.
she lost her shadow.
she went to a Whalers game to see Kiko.
she cooks Indian curry with Old Spice.
she leaves tell tales signs she's been using my computer - white out (tipp ex) is on the screen.
she took a job cutting grass on an Oil Rig.
I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
it took her 2 days to make Microwaveable Pot Noodles.
she invented a silent car alarm.
that when you stand beside her you can actually hear the ocean
she really thought the cinema was selling Free Willies...
she watches The Three Stooges and takes notes.
she was born on Halloween and can't remember her birthday.
she thought Morning Dew was a New York radio station.
she lost her shadow.
she went to a Whalers game to see Kiko.
Deleted User
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14:08 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
she somehow got fired from a Blow-Job
she thought Hot Meals were stolen food.
she make Laurel and Hardy look like Nobel Prize winners.
she aks me what Jeans I wear. I said 'Guess' and she said - 'Wrangler???'
when I asked her to purchase me a Colour TV she asked me...'Which colour?'
she thought Hot Meals were stolen food.
she make Laurel and Hardy look like Nobel Prize winners.
she aks me what Jeans I wear. I said 'Guess' and she said - 'Wrangler???'
when I asked her to purchase me a Colour TV she asked me...'Which colour?'
Deleted User
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14:10 Fri 6 May 05 (BST) [Link]
okay i know most of those are crap but some are funny, i think
Deleted User
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12:45 Sun 8 May 05 (BST) [Link]
I don't think i'd be alive if it weren't for your jokes simon
Deleted User
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13:17 Sun 8 May 05 (BST) [Link]
I think the world could quite possibly end without them.
15:33 Sun 8 May 05 (BST) [Link]
its Halloween all the time now. every time i go too asda with my mom ppl r all dressed up. and some women think there ninjas
Deleted User
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08:58 Sat 14 May 05 (BST) [Link]
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh........right
Deleted User
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06:20 Sun 22 May 05 (BST) [Link]
that could just mean she's well off, so she could have two proeties in different places, thus having two different postal codes
thankyou
;-)
thankyou
;-)
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Your mum jokes
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