The new title is......*drumrolls*..Sarcasm.......

I am no good at sarcasm,
I never had the knack
for whenever I tried sarcasm
I got caned for "answering back"
Sarcasm should be on the Nat. Curric.
To get it right you must be quick
For when the bully shouts with glee
"hey yer scunner, yer lookin at me"
it's no good thinking of a good reply
five hours later, the moment has passed by
As you shout, with confidence "yes sir
I was looking the missing link"
but you're in front of the mirror
so bruised that you can't blink.
Well, that wasn't strictly sarcasm
I'd rather call it cheek
but my brain has had a spasm
and you know my poem's weak!

Mr G ??? No Poem ??......

Sarcasm

Apparently sarcasm was 'the lowest sense of wit',
But sometimes i find sarcasm hillarious, often when i hear it.
There are the right times to use it, but also times are bad,
And the slightest sense of sarcasm, can make a person mad.

A knew a lad named Billy Boy, his spirit always high,
He'd learnt to always be happy, after losing his eye.
So one day he was in the park, had been drinking all day long,
The park attenders, rang the police, for he wouldnt stop shouting on.

They asked him questions as his sat on the ground,
But sarcastic he was, making outrages answers and sounds.
They fetched him up, and he swung his fists,
Luckily, Billy always missed.

...

So in the station, they asked him some more,
The most sarcastic of boys, making jokes galore.
But now he sits in the cold of his scruffy old cell,
Bill realised his sarcasm - had not done him well.

Ha ha ha ha .....its a draw....OH I LUV THIS THREAD..........

D'ya think Squeezy will come back??

Next title is...........Snow.....

Lol i dont know, hopefully, ---i feel like i been away from this site for ages (dunno why lol).

There was once a great big shower of snow,
That covered a great mass of land.
The village decided to put on a show,
Of which group of people could build the best snowman.

So there was Mr G, Paula, Swing and Miss Steph,
Putting on their gloves and running outside.
They built the man until they had run out of breathe,
He was as tall as a building, reaching up to the sky.

They decided to give the man a simple name, peter.
They must of surely won the 'build the best snowman race'.
After measuring, the height was called at 110 metre
And by the end of the day, they were given first place.

Imagine...you are on an island
There are no trees
There are no big rocks
Just you and the sand
and a fridge
It runs on magic
Full of cold drinks and food
to help you through the heat
you burn your clothes in celebration
all alone, you sit in bliss
It snows
Damn

Ha ha ha,,u getting bored of this Swing??......

Mr G...Winner!


Title: Socks!........

I went swimming in the sea
as naked as a man can be
I'd left my clothes upon some rocks
shirt and trousers, boxers, socks
my shoes were there, phone as well
as I swam about in ocean swell
I walked from the surf and shook my locks
my clothes had gone, they'd left my socks
I stood there nude, and rubbed my eyes
I had nothing with which I could disguise
my naked self from horrid mocks
One question, Where to wear my socks!!

I LOVE IT!!!!

Socks

Socks have a life that nobody knows,
An odd sock appears, another one goes.
Some socks go missing for week on end,
Then you realise he was left at a friends.

Socks are paired up and can fall in love,
Some socks are used for snow, instead of a glove.
Some socks are injured, with a hole at the end,
Odd socks are paired up, and soon become friends.

There are socks that are smelly, that are put in the bin,
Some socks are blown off the line, and live in the garden.
But we all love our socks, however they are made,
They keep our feet warm, so in the end its fair play.

Fantastic!

Ha ha cheers mate! yours was too.

Ohhhhh i hate this bit......Sorry, got to go to Mr G again that one... *hugs swing*,aw,....


Title: Magazine/s...........

Sat in the dentist i was waiting for the call,
Twiddling my thumbs and staring at the walls.
I bought a refreshment from the drinks machine,
then sat myself down with a magazine.

Spreads about women, with babies alone,
a story about a girl being filmed slapped on a phone.
A turkish lover, leaving with thousands of pounds,
A young infant boy, that could not hear a sound.

I sat there and thought how i was blessed with luck,
A roof over my head, and a mum that can cook.
The magazine had stories of people so sad,
I wished for the lives that they all could of had.

So out came my name 'steven to room four'
I knew the route, i had been here before.
I took the magazine, to my home is where it was took.
That day i realised, we are all blessed with luck.


Edited at 23:18 Wed 5/04/06 (BST)

FAB!! JUST FAB!!.............

Swing, ur turn,..........

i dunno if he's writin one!!!!

In the meantime il keep us happy with a quicky :

I was walking along the road on a summers day,
When i met a girl, named Betty-May.
She had red luscious lips, and long brunette hair,
Every time i walked past i would stop, and stare.
But today she ran over, and gave me a smile,
My heart nearly beat through my chest, and ran for a mile.
A phone number she give me, and a kiss on the cheek,
I rang her and organised a date for next week.
So we each grew up together, never leaving ones side.
With the two children she bore, i felt immense pride.
A house near the beach, i sit here with ink and feather,
Expressing my joy, hoping it will go on forever.

Magazines

The haze swept over, the sand was hot
Coming home? All fear not
Wondering dunes with regiments scattered
Wounded, homesick, bruised and battered
Settlements raided, hear them cry
Not for long, sprayed, they die
For swept over has the mighty machine
Deadly guns, full magazines.
Left are wounded, screaming, bleeding
These magazines are unpleasant reading
Endless wondering of the middle east
Wonder more about unseen peace
Fresh troops arrive to add to the plot
But coming home? I fear not.

Not such a happy/funny one this time...

Great poem squeezy!

Where were u for the previous ones????